Saturday, April 12, 2008

mini-van mom escapes for the day

My head feels stuffed up

With words and experiences

From students, boyfriend, children and the like

(you're a bad teacher, get out of my space, don't talk to me, you're going to meet my mother, tell me you missed me, what's for dinner, are you paying for it, did you remember to pick up the milk, you're not paying enough attention to me, you're not paying enough attention to me, you're not paying enough attention to me)

Everything echoing, echoing in my head

So

I run

As fast as I can

Like a crazy man

As far as I could

Probably farther than I should

Just to get away

If only I could stay

So very, very far away

So

I left my kayak at home

I put on flip flops on purpose

I don't want to move

I want to be still

To sit by the river

And hear what it has to say

So

I climbed up on a rock

That I knew very well

In this place I began an acquaintance

With both a river and a man

"Cut straight across till you get to the middle then go straight ahead between the rocks, there will be more shoals later but deal with what's in front of you now"

Relationships are like rivers fun and dangerous at the same time

If relationships are like rivers

Then rapids are sex

And a good set of shoals can make your breath quicken

If relationships are like rivers

Now here's a thought worth pondering on

Some rivers go on forever

They're wide, mighty and strong

Most of what I write

Won't make it to the web

So much of what we think

Should never be said

After that

I stopped today

At the Whistle Stop Café

Up in Juliet

Where the no cell signal can find you

I sat by a window

The rain coming down

I could see it splash on the river

And all around

The train went by,

The music was country,

The ketchup bottle was glass
And the ketchup wouldn't come out

The burger was hand formed and oddly shaped,

Grilled in the back

Greasy and enormous

The flavor was unbelievable

So I ate and ate

A cowboy strides in

His step is over confident

But catches my eye

Tourists are here too

Accents in sandals

But they keep the town afloat

So

I'm up in Juliet where no cell phone can reach

To listen and hear what the river can teach

Is it God or the river I'm listening to today?

It's funny to think a river has something to say

After all it was God who create every rock in its bed

So why oh why would I listen to it instead

Instead of the creator

Of this stretch of nature

So

I take the trail at the bottom of the dam

Cross the wet wood bridge

To walk the narrow muddy path

To the metal grate over rushing water

Where young men

Dare each other to dive in

Deep

I take the ladder in hand

And climb up to the top of the dam

But do not walk out where the water goes over

Leave that to the stupid

There are plenty that will

So

I sat on the top

Feeling the vibration of water through the concrete

The mist on my face from the water crashing below

The birds in a frenzy for the insects above

And watched the people fish from the dam and from rock

Cast out, reel in

Cast out, reel in

Move from rock to rock, turn around, turn around then do it again

Didn't catch anything, makes a face

Cast out, reel in

Cast out, reel in

Move from rock to rock, turn around, turn around then do it again

Maybe it's my bait, are there even any fish

Cast out, reel in

Cast out, reel in

Move from rock to rock, turn around, turn around then do it again

Finally, finally a fish he's caught, will he keep it or will he not

Cast out, reel in

Cast out, reel in

Move from rock to rock, turn around, turn around then do it again

Look at the river

Imprint what you see

Listen to the river

Embed it in your memory

Learn from the river

Take it with you when you go

Remember; remember the soothing affect of its flow

We all need comfort

We all have burdens to bear

God gives us a lot

God gives us means of support and comfort

It up to us to take them

Posted by brenda at 23:55:49 | Permanent Link | Comments (4) |
Comments
1 - This was an enjoyable read. (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2008/04/13 - 04:16:40
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2 - thanks,
I was thinking of editing and deleting parts that seemed ill written or inappropriate (Comment this)

Written by: brenda at 2008/04/14 - 02:20:04
3 - Sometimes we just don't understand the demands that we put on others. Sometimes the ones that are needed need to be needed. Other times they just need to need. Most of us aren't good with a balance in this area. I'm not. (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2008/04/14 - 14:20:07
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4 - Some rivers do go on forever, changing everything in their path, some just flow with the lay of the land, disturbing very little and giving life giving substance to everything that they touch. Today, I'm going to try to be that life giving river. Praying that everything I touch reflects that. Especially my relationships. (Comment this)

Written by: Bob at 2008/04/14 - 14:47:51
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